This is really interesting, thank you.

These are gorgeous. Nice work.

Thank you, I appreciate it! :)

As someone unfamiliar with this field, I'm amazed at how readable this is. Must be a great professor.

Great idea! What/who are you using to print the postcards?

Thank you! Right now it's wired up to Lob to print/send postcards.

Aphex Twin's "Digeridoo" is incredible. It's a 4-song EP so it repeats often, but that's a feature for me.

This is neat. I could picture the book in my mind though I haven't seen it or pictures of it in ages.

This article corrected my thinking though. I always thought those sketches were of diatoms. I had never heard of radiolarians before. Neat stuff.

Nice find, thank you. Your sleuthing is appreciated.

Oh dope. Added to my feedbin!

A stronger communal life and volunteering of some kind. Therapy may help, but I think it's still too focused on the self. Get out, meet people, talk to them, and most importantly, listen to them. Ask questions. Find a way to get curious about other people and the world around you. Find groups of people with shared interests, but also try to find new interests.

Very cool. I just spotted the last of the ruby throated hummingbirds at my feeder here in NH.

I often hear people talking about aches and pains as signs of ageing, but for me it's been a heightened awareness and interest in birds and gardening. One of my best friends is a military guy that, unfortunately, saw combat and the terrible things that go with that. He's obsessed with his flowers and just this past week was sending me pictures of both flowers and bulbs.

There are many kinds of meditation. I'm not sure what kind you're describing, but the way I've learned it is to not be focused on any one thing, but to let thoughts arise and pass without clinging to them or trying to push them away. The effect it's had on my own thinking is to have a better relationship with my brain. I'm less reactive and find myself ruminating a lot less.

There are still dangers here from what I understand. Those with trauma can have past events pop up unexpectedly and have, undertandably, negative reactions. Most medtiation teachers recommend seeing a professional for guidance for people like this.

While you clearly didn't benefit from whatever kind of meditation you were doing you may find that other kinds of meditation help you with the very problems you're identifying. Or not. Many (most?) people live fulfilling lives without ever meditating.

That said, I think most people benefit from physical activity. Note that I don't say exercise, I think the latter is great - I row almost daily in addition to doing calisthenics, working my kettlebells, etc. - but I think modern culture and the fitness industry have conflated physical activity and exercise.

Regardless, I'm glad you found something that works for you and that you didn't continue to force a path on yourself that clearly wasn't working. I think this kind of self-awarness and adjustment is important.