I find that when people preface a statement with a negation, it has the opposite effect and draws focus to that aspect. "With all due respect," or "no offense but," or "not to be rude but..."
That may be true, but I think the poster didn't frame their actual question charitably enough, causing the phatic expression prefacing the question to be rendered completely useless.
IMHO, it was quite confrontational if you mentally leave it out: "... under what moral framework do you find it reasonable to bring more than 10 children into this world?"
